hello everybody

sorry for the xxxtreme lack of posting; just thought I'd let you know what's up. So I got this job teaching math in Dobbs Ferry, and it's been a really hectic three weeks trying to adjust, move in, and negotiate the environment..... I love this program though. Even though every day I am basically extremely sad, guilt-ridden, and terrified, often hoping I will suffer some horrible accident to get me out of teaching, I can see the very bright light at the end of the tunnel. This place is an incredible spot for kids and will be an incredible spot for me, once I can get my "sea legs" and not feel like a harried commuter carrying tons of books and papers, all slipprily edging out of my grasp as I sprint to catch an already-leaving train.

I wonder why I almost always end up in jobs that involve kids, even though I have no real special interest in that area ( as i do in, say, social theory and taiko). Thinking about it, I intuit that part of me feels incomplete unless I feel like I am participating in the development of the next generation. I don't really know what that means (on a literal level), and I don't know if it's true.... but that's the best explanation I can come up with now. Experience tells me that somewhere down the line I'll discover a much less savory reason...... like that I need to feel control, or I need to feel validation of my own academic excitement.... but right now none of those explanations seems right.

Anyway, I gotta prepare some math stuff... but holla whenever peeps, and I'll get back on these deeds with ......... couth frequency.